How to make dating work
Christmas is imminent, bringing - among many things – the annual office blowout.Excitement swirls, the rumour mill charges up, serotonin and alcohol flow in equal measures.My boyfriend and I are both foodies, so on dates we always go out to eat in Koreatown or Little Tokyo.We’re also both geeks at heart, so we’ll enjoy catching a few episodes of Pawn Stars on the History Channel together on a weeknight.The first thing that we all think when it comes to dating someone from work is, "What if it doesn't work out? You'll have to face that person every day afterwards. The ego stands right next to the career in front of the firing squad. Unfortunately, there is no absolute remedy for this. Clearly, calibration extends to the obvious fact that you work together. It might work, it might not – that is the risk that you take. But come Monday, are you going to be cool and collected, or awkward and weird?Dating being dating, there is always the risk of things going pear-shaped; that's the wager that you're forced to make with yourself the second you hit puberty and step into the dating ring. But even if you've worked up the courage to put your rep on the line, that doesn't automatically immunise the other party from having their own concerns. If it doesn't work out, don't be bitter, don't be distant, don't make a big deal of it. Any workplace relationship, be it a casual hook-up or something more, requires a considerable amount of self-control and maturity.But we also have very different academic interests: My boyfriend is studying architecture and I’m a business major.
As many red flags as the office romance waves, it actually can make a lot of sense.
The fact stands – if you're willing to have a crack, there is a chance it could end in tears. Non-neediness As with all dating, if the other party knows that you're mature and non-needy, they will be a lot more comfortable taking up your generous offer.
It comes down to potential risk versus potential reward. In my opinion, having experienced the odd workplace dalliance, the keys to making it work are: 1) calibration, 2) maturity, 3) non-neediness, 4) respect. If they can see that you're emotionally strong and will be OK regardless of the outcome, it's one fewer worry to weigh up.
But for all you romantics out there, take heart: Having a serious relationship in college is possible.
I never expected to be in a long-term relationship myself, and now I’ve been with my boyfriend for over two years in college.